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Yael Eini

I don’t love my children the same way


Mom, who do you love more?


I look at my children and I love them very much. Each and every one of them. But I don’t love them the same way.


Each child brings to my life something else, a different observation about me, about them.


Each one of brings a different beauty and other challenges.


I don’t love my kids the same and to tell me or them that I love them the same is a lie. It’s a lie to myself and a lie to them.


Rather, define each of these kids – how I love him and what I love about him and what binds me to him and my love to him. To see this, and to cherish and empower that it’s much more important.


Furthermore, even kids get angry being told ‘ I love all your brothers and you the same’.


What they are not unique? They’re not different?


Every child wants to be loved differently.


We think that a kid wants to be loved more then his brothers, and a lot of times they want us to really loved just them. But, every kid wants us to love them differently.


My invitation to you this week:


Write what are those special things in your children that when they do or say, or when looking at them, your heart expands. What makes the connection between you and each of your children larger and stronger.


And save it to yourself, so that next time, when a child asks you whether you like him more, you will say: “I love you differently,” and you can even explain what dose “differently” means.

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